Rewind

All of a sudden, my mind drifted back to my good old childhood days. While i tried to recall as many of those fond (and some not so fond) memories as possible, without realizing it, i found that I'm smiling to myself as those thought filled my mind thinking how sweet yet silly it really was back then.

-20 years ago-

6 years old - Kindergarten


Oh no, today is the day i have to leave and be away from home for the very first time for school. I do not like this at all, not even one bit! How far was my school then, one would ask? Well, it is just at one of those houses in the next street around the corner. Yes, it's just some 10mins walk away, maybe 5. My mum even promised to send me to the school that morning and would be back on time to pick me up at noon, not one minute late! Still, i am not convinced, my body and my feet felt heavy as i dragged myself onto the back of the bicycle, ready to be "chauffeured" to the school by my mum. Even the brand spanking new uniform feels like everything else except comfortable.

Will i be able to make new friends?

Will i see ever my mum again?

Can i ever go home again?

What if....?

All these thought flooded my already stressed out little brain. I started to sob as i entered through the gate, refused to let go of my mum. She reassured me, but it only made the situation worse. I started to cry, wanting to be pampered and told that everything is gonna be alright. After a few pushes, i finally gave in.

I saw many other cheerful kids who were around my age at that time. Everybody seems to have their own circle of friends, except me. I felt really left out since i was kind of shy and do not usually approach other kids to make friends. I remember very vividly that my very first "lesson" was clay shaping, also more fondly known as the plasticine class. That's when i would loosened up a little bit and became less paranoid because it was a so fun i wish every period would be the same. Of course, it wasn't.

I finally made some friends towards the end of first day and to my surprise, i found that the boys and the girls had their respective groups and does not really get along with each other. This was when the infamous "hmph, i don wan fren you" threat was first encountered. I often find myself getting distracted and depressed after getting those remarks and soon i found myself working really hard to gain recognition and acceptance from the others. I was worried that nobody wanted to befriend me, and that i would end up being left alone. Everything seems.... so fragile. There were even once that i went and literally beg them not "outcast" me and yes, i cried when they refused to listen to my plead. It went on for a few days when they finally "accepted" me into their group. Yes, it might sounds trivial now, but trust me, it wasn't the case for me, or any other kids of my age for that matter. It was that bad :(

Of course, eventually i grew adapted to the new environment and since then, there have been so many events (most of which i couldn't remember) took place. The sport day, ABC classes, the mandarin classes with homeworks involving unending repetition of chinese characters writing, math,recess time (where i brought sandwiches made by my mum in a little squarish tupperwares, it was pretty decent), occasionally envious of other who got better homemade breakfast.

While i've enjoyed the better most of my kindergarten days, i must say that the thing that I had always look forward to the most everyday was for my mum to show up, smiling at the gate to fetch me home. I would always charge at her energetically like a mad bull whenever i see her. Best of all, she had never failed to show up on time! Early, sometimes. Late, never once.


to be continued...